November 7, 2023
As parents, we don’t often think to reiterate our thoughts on something that has already been said, or should be known. But we should always reassure our children about where we are with them. They need to know, and its good for them to know.
A big problem I have found with teens I have worked with is the lack of communication with their parents in both directions. While a child is growing up, you cannot communicate enough. Sometimes things may need to be said 1000 times before they sink in. Reassurance becomes necessary.
Here are more things to say to your child and why it is important to say them.
25. I could never stop loving you. That doesn’t mean you approve of everything they do, and they need to understand that difference. It’s difficult for a child, even teenagers, to understand not liking what someone is doing but still loving them.
26. I’m listening. It has been my experience that most teenagers don’t feel heard by their parents. Tell them you are listening, and then show them the same.
27. That’s a great question. Acknowledging this in your child builds confidence in them. When they ask good questions, let them know you see it.
28. That was a really good choice. This is not just about your approval. It’s about letting them know when they think something through and make the best choice.
29. That was brave. Recognizing and acknowledging bravery in your child’s actions is huge for their confidence and sense of self. Most children don’t see themselves as brave. So when an adult calls that out, it means something significant to them.
30. That took courage. Like bravery, recognizing and acknowledging courage is huge in building their identity and sense of self. Help your children to define courage as “being scared and doing it anyway” and watch them soar.
31. Well done. Let them know when they’ve done a good job. This one has the same amount of power as “I love you.”
32. You were right. Whether their own claim or in opposition to another person or idea, let them know they were right. This reassurance also grows their confidence in their own voice.
Communicating with your child can be difficult at times. But it is important to reassure them that you are on their side. Use these statements to let them know that you are there for them.
Related: 40 Things To Say To Your Child: 1 – 8
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CEO at Thrivology
Todd has a Master of Science degree in Marriage & Family Therapy from Harding University and has been a therapist for over 22 years. He has extensive experience with teenagers and families treating relational problems, addictions and behavioral problems.
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